Introducing

Bowe Warrick Hawkins
8 lbs. 1 oz. 20 inches long. Born at 11:35 am

on Tuesday, September 4, 2007.

He is so precious. I forgot how sweet and little and cuddly they are when they are born. We are already so in love with him and look forward to learning all about him.


We had an exciting experience of course. Nothing really goes as planned. I was quite anxious and nervous, but trying hard to remain calm. Ava had been dropped off at Grandma's so I knew she'd be fine. We sat in our hospital room and I realized that in only a few hours we'd be back in there with a baby boy.

Our last family photo Pre-Bowe.

My final profile just shy of 40 weeks.

Here is my story. Sorry if there's too much detail. That's really the only way I know how to tell stories. They took us down to prep me for surgery. I signed all the papers and went through all the instructions and pre-op exams. Then they put my IV in and for some reason, I felt so ill as soon as it started dripping into my arm. I looked at Todd and passed out. I was out for only about 30 seconds, but when I came to, there were 4 nurses and Dr.'s standing around me looking very concerned. They laid me on my side and immediately hooked up the baby's heart monitor. Someone said, "I can't find a heartbeat." Surprisingly, I did not freak out at this moment because I had just felt him moving. I was still a little out of it and feeling ill and so confused. I could hear the heart rate on the doppler and they kept saying, "is that mom's or the baby's?" It turned out, they were listening to Bowe's heart rate, but it was slower than mine which is unusual. It was dangerously low.


That's when things really picked up. Another Dr came in and said they couldn't wait for my Dr and had to take me in and get the baby out. Excuse me? Who are you? What's going on? Within a minute, my doctor, Dr. Klimek was standing over me telling me everything would be OK, but the baby was letting us know he needed to come out faster than they were ready for. They started wheeling me to the OR and I remember running over like 2 nurses on the way because they were in such a hurry. I was of course, shaking uncontrollably. They then told Todd he had to wait outside and couldn't come in because I was going under general anesthesia. What???? I squeezed his hand and that was it.


In the operating room, it seemed like there were 25 people running around like chickens with their heads cut off. The Anesthesiologist was the only one talking to me. He kept saying, "people will come at with a million different things, but you seem fairly calm. Try to remain calm. I will put the anesthesia in and you'll feel a stinging, but you'll be out within 3 seconds." Meanwhile, they put a sheet over me about two inches from my face and people were pushing and pulling me from 20 different directions. I felt my stomach being cleaned and I even felt two people standing as if ready to cut. Wait! I'm still awake. OK, I feel the stinging, and then there was darkness.


The rest of this saga is from Todd's account. He said within 10 minutes of my entering the room he heard the baby cry. It was the hardest thing for him to stand outside the door. He peeked in whenever the door opened. Because he was already in his scrubs, the nurse took pity on him and brought him in to the baby. He couldn't go near me. He said he tried to see me, but the nurse brought him back to the baby. I had a tube in my throat and was pretty much covered up by people and sheets anyways. He said they then had to vacate the room and Todd was sent to the nursery with the baby. Everyone left except one x-ray tech who stayed and x-rayed my entire abdomen. They hadn't had time to count the instruments so this was standard procedure to be sure there was nothing left inside me. I thought that was kind of funny. So here I am cut wide open, in a room by myself being x-rayed for lost surgical instruments.

The important thing is, as soon as Bowe was out, he was fine. My surgery was fine as well. They took their time sewing me up and said there was very little scarring from the first c-section so I'd be fine to have more children. I woke up sobbing in the recovery room. I was so confused and in lots of pain. When you have spinal anesthesia, it lasts for much longer and you can't feel anything for a long time. With general anesthesia you pretty much wake up to all the pain. I don't know why I was crying. The nurses said that was normal. Todd said I had actually been awake for at least 10 minutes and was talking to people, thanking them for taking care of me, etc. I have no recollection of that. I only remember seeing Bowe, feeling pain, and wondering what in the heck just happened. The first 18 hours was pretty confusing to me. I was relieved that the baby was OK, but I couldn't think clearly or really comprehend what had happened. It wasn't until the next day that I really bonded with him and felt a little more like myself.

The rest of my hospital stay was uneventful. I'm healing well. Bowe is healthy and normal. He didn't lose that much weight which is great. He's a great eater and sleeper. He seems to be a happy baby. I know it's really too soon to tell, but he never fusses just to fuss. He doesn't even cry that much. He has more of a squeak and grunt that let's us know he wants something. Todd and I are so grateful for the Dr.'s and everyone who took care of us. Who knows why it happened like this. I'm really at peace about it all. We ended up both being fine and we got to bring home a healthy baby so I don't much care how he got here.

And now the picture parade . . .

Ava was so sweet and tender when she came to visit. She was very careful with me and just loved to look at Bowe. She investigated his hands and face and stroked his soft hair. I loved that moment. She will be a great big sister. I can tell it is an adjustment for her, but with a little time she'll be fine.

Todd's Mom.

My parents.

Proud Daddy.

Just for fun, here is a picture of Ava her first week. I think they look quite different. We're still not sure who Bowe looks like, but there's a good chance he may look like Mommy. Ava looks so much like Daddy. I would even be happy for a good combo of the two of us.

And a happy baby Bowe.